Mawwage is what bwings us togeva today...

When I tell people I'm married, they immediately assume I'm a newlywed because I look young. But, actually, Kyle and I just shared our 6th year anniversary, which means we are well out of the honeymoon stage and beginning the (cute) old married couple stage.  It's been a whirlwind of emotions and adventures these last six years from graduating college to first jobs to dog babies to new jobs to a new house.  Time flies when you're having fun, eh?

That's exactly what we're good at.  We've laughed our way through some pretty great times. However, as anyone knows, marriage isn't all fun and games.  When two stubborn, hard headed people live together, it can raise some blood pressure.  For instance, he constantly insists he is right, but I know I always am.  It doesn't matter the subject.  As infuriating as he is sometimes, I love sharing my life with him.  He knows me better than I know myself and always knows how to make me laugh when my face is purple with frustration.  He is my BFF, and he is my perfect opposite.  While I hesitate to speak my mind in fear of hurting feelings, bluntness is his second nature.  While I am soft-spoken, he is the life of the party.  While I am somewhat cautious, he is a dare-devil.  If I insist we drink water, he's adamant about drinking Dr. Pepper.  He is my opposite in every way, which is why we work so well together.  We're all about balance.

Don't get me wrong, the man knows how to push my buttons and does things just to make my skin crawl.  I think he prides himself on that.  It drives me crazy that every week he finds a new hobby.  One week he won't live unless he gets a new mountain bike, but the next week he is trying to sell it so he can buy something else.  I don't understand.  I also don't understand how when I rewind the TV and hit play, the sound just quits, like it's laughing at me.  Then, when he presses a button, it's like nothing ever happened.  Or if I restart the computer, it won't turn back on, but if he restarts it, the computer literally grows arms and hugs him.  It's like men have this unspoken relationship with technology.  That or technology hates me, plain and simple.

I don't get how he spends all day reading forums about Formula 1 racing.  I can't stand the amount of car shows he watches.  I hate that when I eat pizza and cinna stix, I'll see it on my hips the next morning, but when he does it, he stays the same.  I hate that he forces me to talk about things that bother me, but I love it at the same time because he'd rather stay up all night than go to bed angry.  However, if these are the worst of our problems, I'd say we're doing OK.

Then again, I do my fair share of crazy, which he remarkably puts up with.  For example, when I change 13 times because "I have nothing to wear,"he calmly suggests I go with the first thing I tried on and convinces me that I look great.  Or when I can't make a decision, he will quietly listen and stare while I argue with myself about what I should or shouldn't do, and he may even offer some advice.  Or when I constantly vent to him about issues at work during his favorite car show, he puts on a fake smile and nods along and even fist pumps in agreement even though he really couldn't care less.

Of course, these are all minor things, but the real joy I find in our relationship is in the little every day things, like finishing each other's sentences with movie quotes or song lyrics or lines from How I Met Your Mother.  For example, instead of just telling me it is hot in the house, he quotes the chorus of the Jonas Brothers' song "Burnin Up."  My husband is cool, guys.  Another one of our favorite family activities is when we howl like maniacs to get our dog Rush to "sing."  Then we make fun of our other dog Roxy, who sounds like a raccoon being choked when she tries to sing with the rest of us.

We also have fun annoying each other.  When I have headphones blaring music in my ears and I decide sing along just as loudly, he will stare at me and discreetly slide his phone in front of him, threatening to make a vine of how off key I am.  That's his way of asking me to stop.  We coddle our dog children and annoy them when we're bored.  We watch volleyball.  We watch Pitch Perfect and quote every line.  We watch the Tour de France and soccer games.  We cook dinner (sometimes).  We are lazy.  Most importantly, we spend most of our time laughing. At each other or at our dogs.  That is my favorite part.

He is my best friend, my fashion consultant, my sounding board, my built-in chef, my handy man, my supporter, my comedian, my hero, and the only face I want to see after a stressful, hair-pulling day at school.  We are far from perfect but words cannot describe how much I appreciate him in my life.  Marriage to me means having a partner that truly understands all of who you are and still loves you unconditionally, even through all the ugly parts.  I'm so blessed to have found that in a man whom I respect and adore.  Thanks, husband, for seeing something worth loving in me.

Happy 6 years, Kyle.  Sixty years from now, we'll be old and wrinkled but still laughing and quoting movies - if we can remember them.  I love you, Kyle Nielsen.



This sums up our relationship pretty well.

My husband is cooler than yours.

To-Do List

When you're bored or unmotivated, try revisiting your ever-growing to-do list, such as this one to make sure you stay focused on the important things.  I dare you.

Write a letter.
Write a poem.
Read a book.
Write down what you wonder about.
Just stop.
Observe and write.
Eavesdrop and write down the conversations you hear.
Write a book.
Draw a picture.
Describe a thunderstorm.
Write about a memory.
Write small.
Write down an inspiring story you hear today.
Write honestly.  Scrape the heart.
Write funny things.
People watch and make characters out of what you see.
Listen to the voices in your head.
Write what you're feeling.
Make a list of idioms.
Make a list of cliches.
Make a list of your favorite aphorisms or make one up.
Make a bucket list.
Talk in a different accent to a stranger.
Shake a stranger's hand and record their reaction.
Discover something new about yourself.

You never know what you might find.

Keeping Austin Batty

Last week I took a mini-vacation to Austin.  Well, that's not entirely true.  It ended up being my mini getaway for the summer, but it wasn't the sole purpose for the trip.  Some colleagues and I signed up to go to Texas' capitol for a coaches clinic.  Thankfully, we had an Austin guru among us to lead us to some stellar eating places.  I'd been to Austin before, but I never really realized what a cool city it was.

We arrived Tuesday afternoon, but before settling into our hotel for the night, we enjoyed a delicious dinner at the Hula Hut.  If you've never been, I highly recommend it.  Good food.  Good views.  Good service.

Full and happy, we finally settled in to our ninth floor hotel room with our splendid view of downtown Austin construction.  No better noise to fall asleep to than the hums and whistles of racing police cars, the booming music accompanying the constant celebration of weird on 6th street, and the steady hammering of nighttime construction.  Ah, the city life.  Quite a change from the songs of crickets and cows lulling me to sleep in the middle of nowhere, TX.

Seven-thirty came early the next morning when we were up and at 'em, ready for a "fun" day of coaching lectures.  Although we were somewhat disappointed with the content of the sessions, we capitalized on the free stuff from all the exhibits: t-shirts, tote bags, popcorn, and cookies.  I even saw a familiar face.  As I rounded a corner of one of the aisles, I was pretty sure I saw my freshman volleyball coach from high school standing at a booth about twenty feet away.  I thought my eyes were tricking me, so I did a double-take to get a better look, staring awkwardly to make sure.  Stalker status, I know.  Feeling brave, I approached her completely ready to just keep on walking when I knew she wouldn't recognize me.  I mean, it's been 10 years!  Surprisingly, she shouted my my name in spastic recognition slurring my first and last name together. Yep, that's her.  We exchanged the awkward "how are you" and "where are you teaching now?" conversations, but it was pretty cool to experience a "look at me now, I've grown out of my adolescent acne" moment.

Wednesday was my birthday, so of course, my friends wouldn't let me go without celebrating.  Don't worry, we weren't influenced by the 6th street insanity even though we saw our share of crazy.  We settled for a much tamer approach (which I prefer) at a fun, authentic Italian place called Mandola's.  Pasta and gelato - can't go wrong there.

After dinner, at my prodding, we journeyed the ten or so blocks to the bridge to watch the bats where we encountered an interesting, deaf gentleman who was almost run over.  Did I mention Austinites are crazy?  This dude was strolling across a busy intersection like it was no big deal jumping in front of speeding cars like a ninja.  He just wanted everyone to see the bats and to sell his homemade buttons that said, "Keep Austin Batty," which was apparently worth sacrificing his life.  But, finally we heard the squeaking, chattering bats awakening from their slumber.

They started on one side of the bridge and worked their way across like fans at a baseball game engage the wave around the whole park.  The bats would start in sections gliding under the bridge in circles around each other like they were warming up for a long journey.  After a few laps, they darted above the trees in a line, summoning the next bat section to start their warm up laps.  It felt like they could lift the bridge and carry us off with them at any second.  Once each section of bats completed their warm up circles, they all exploded toward the trees, flying in a chaotic black cloud over the lake until they met with the rest of their clan.  Together, these small winged fur balls, arranged themselves in a long black line that swirled and zig zagged above the greenery.  They created pictures and shapes in the sky that resembled what I doodled on my notes during the coaching clinic.  Spirals and zig zags.  Swoops and swirls.  They were a black marker against the pale sunset marking their territory above the trees.  It was pretty neat to watch.

                                                (It's hard to see in the pictures, but I tried.)

After a few more selfies and a stroll down 6th street (we had to see the crazies up close), we called it a night, but not before making fun of the show "Pretty Wicked Moms" on TLC as we fell asleep.  All in all, it was a pretty great birthday, thanks to my friends Pamela and Allison!

Thursday we endured a few more brutal coaching lessons before we grabbed some deliciousness for lunch and headed home.  I had no idea Austin was such a cool place.  (Granted, the last time I was there I'm pretty sure I was around eleven and all I cared about was Six Flags.)  There are tons of fancy restaurants and shopping places.  There are people everywhere walking or riding their bikes, swerving in and out of traffic.  There are bats!  Where else can you go to watch bats fly around in the same place you can see half naked drunk people strutting their stuff?  I'm easily entertained, yes.  So, thanks Austin for my mini-vacay this year.  You didn't disappoint!

Favorite Words

After researching some about using writer's notebooks in the classroom, I decided to make a list of all my favorite words.  I don't know why I haven't done this before.  Perhaps this is a result of my brain trying to function at such a late hour, but I thought it was a pretty fun game, spouting off words and chuckling to myself at how clever I think I am.  I even tried to get Kyle involved, but he didn't find it too entertaining.  Oh well, I'm proud to wear the English nerd hat.

These are not in alpha order.  I'm not OCD, just look at my house.  The list is ever-growing, but here are some of my favorite words:

amalgamate
apoplectic
superfluous
eclectic
satiate
propel
evoke
extrapolate
excavate
fallible
fiasco
frenzy
malleable
commiserate
eccentric
kinesthetic
nurture
zealous/zeal
zoom
expel
suffice
concede
unapologetic
surface
chuckle
cackle
exacerbate
frazzled
baffled
dumbfounded
articulate
enunciate

I could keep going but I'll stop here.
What are some of your favorite words?

Getting old, learning life

With my birthday coming in just a few days, it's time to face the depressing truth that I'm now closer to 30 than 20.  Where did the time go? It's crazy how adulthood sneaks up on you.  One day I'm playing kickball in the street, the next I'm graduating high school, then college, and now, I'm in the "real world" trying to be a good wife, teacher, coach, and friend.  I won't bore you by listing all the things I haven't crossed off the bucket list, but I will reflect on some lessons learned or realizations that have surfaced in my short 26 years of life.  Some will probably be blatant and obvious, but bare with me.  In no particular order:

1.  Confidence is key.  This is something I learned in teaching, but it's true in all facets of life: teaching, interviewing, dating, meeting new people, confronting someone, and more.  If your confident on the outside, no one has to know your shaking like a leaf on the inside.

2.  Dogs and babies are eerily similar.  You use baby talk when speaking to them.  They both wake you up in the middle of the night.  They both sleep on you and drool on you.  They both need your constant attention.  They both eat/chew on everything.  And they both poop, pee, and throw up in unexpected places.  Except, you can leave a dog at home in a crate.  You can't do that with a baby; it's called child abuse.

3. There will ALWAYS be some new technology my husband will fall in love with.  He's got to have the next iPhone, iPad, or iRobot.  Although, I can't complain too much.  He's pretty responsible and normally finds a way to get us both whatever "i" product there is without breaking the bank.  I'll admit though, I'm still amazed at some of the technologies available, and it scares me a little how dependent we've become on these gadgets.  There is always something new to make life more "convenient."

4.  ALWAYS work hard.  No matter what.  I learned this lesson fairly early in life since I played sports.  If you didn't work hard in practice, you died or at least wished you had worked hard the first time.   Oh, basketball memories... Thank you Coach Kilman for pushing me past the point of exhaustion and teaching me the most rewarding lesson I could have learned in high school.  When you work hard, it will pay off.  Even if it doesn't pay off immediately, you can still be proud of the fact that you didn't quit.  And, people will respect you more in the long run.

5.  No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care.  As cliche as this is, it does ring true.  There is no better example than when I worked with someone who, daily, spouted off everything he knew about everything.  Half the time, I couldn't understand what he was talking about or why, and the other half of the time, I wanted to punch him in the throat just so he'd stop talking.  What I'm trying to say is that, once people realize you care about them, they'll listen to any nonsensical story you throw at them.

6.  Dreams don't always come true.  As depressing as this sounds, I am living proof.  As much as I wanted to be the next Logan Tom on USA's Olympic indoor volleyball team, it just wasn't going to happen.  I didn't have the right genes.  A 5'6'' skinny white girl isn't going to make it very far in the professional sports world, no matter how hard I worked.  Sometimes you just have to have something else going for you other than will power.  It's no accident Destinee Hooker is as good as she is when her father was a professional athlete and mother and top collegiate athlete.

7.  Going away to college was the best decision.  It's the biggest self-exploration experiment you will face.  After your parents drop you off, it's all you.  You decide what kind of person your going to be.  If you fail, you live with the consequences.  If you're a loner (or we'll say an introvert -like me), you figure out how to make friends really quickly.  When you're married and in college and need to save a few bucks, ramen noodles are always there for you.  Ultimately, you learn more about yourself than you ever could have under the shelter of familiarity.

8. Don't listen to what other people say.  This is advice we are given all our lives, but it's so hard to heed.  It's also a very crippling way to live.  Don't let someone take away your stride just because that person needs something to complain about.  Be confident in the gifts God has given you.  Easier said than done but worth it in the end.

9.  Marry someone who makes you laugh.  He doesn't do it much anymore, but when Kyle and I were first married, anytime we went to a drive through, he would talk in a nerdy accent and be as ridiculous as possible.  He just wanted to make those bored employees enjoy their monotony a little more.  For example, at Wendy's he would say to the poor, unassuming victim of sarcasm: "Golly ma'am! That IS a big drink!  You guys don't call it a large for nothin'!"  I couldn't conceal my laughter, so I'd have to turn away.  At the Panda Express drive through the certificate hanging on the wall that proved they had passed inspection was a goldmine.  "Congratulations on your award! You guys must be so proud! That's so great!" As the cashier stared at us as though we were the dumbest people on the planet, I couldn't contain myself. Laughter sputtered out of me like shots of an engine back firing.  Never a dull moment.

10. Never stop learning, growing, reading, writing, exploring.  Growing up, I wasn't that fond of reading, but now that I'm out of school, my "to read" list is ever-growing.  Sometimes when I walk my dogs on the nature trail down the street from our house, my mind travels back in time to a place where pretending wasn't uncommon.  On the trail, instead of the huge, brown burlap sack someone dumped in the grass, I see a silent, brown rhino carcass.  I still have an over-active imagination apparently.  Of course, there is a chance I am crazy (very possible), or maybe I'm just trying to preserve something we all lose at point or another.  I think we're all still kids just hiding inside aging bodies that mask our true identities.  Reading awakens the adventurous side we all seem to ignore once we've morphed into adults.  New possibilities are always waiting.

11. Trust God.  This should be an easy step to follow since I grew up as a pastor's kid.  Wrong.  It's in our nature to only rely on ourselves, but God created us for so much more than that.  Once we yield to His will, the Peace that passes all understanding has free reign in our lives.  As hard as it is to relinquish control, He is more than capable to take care of us.

12. After college, it's harder to make/keep friends. You can't exactly run down the dorm hallways anymore knocking on doors to see who wants to go to dinner.  Once you graduate, friends move away, life happens, so naturally friends lose touch.  Then, if you don't get along with co-workers, you're out of luck.

13.  Laugh or cry or both.  Sometimes it's therapeutic to watch a girly, sappy movie, especially when I'm sitting at home on a Saturday night after a long week with a mile-high stack of papers to grade.  All I have to do is turn on the TV, and the waterworks start up for any Sarah McLachlan animal abuse commercial.  Disney movie? The tears pop out the corners of my eyes and I'm sobbing before I even know what happened.   If you've seen the movie UP, you know what I'm talking about.  In the same way, though, I laugh just as easily.  For example, this new commercial gets me every time.  It's the little things.

Check out this commercial

14. Put yourself out there.  Make a new friend.  Take risks.  All of these require courage, so they all belong in one step.  However, this is not an easy one for me.  I mean, I just told you I saw a dead rhino down the street from my house.  I took a risk telling you I'm crazy! :)  Also, I once tried to get on my roof so I could see the eerie brightness of the moon.  I chickened out, though.  Keep in mind; this was like 2 weeks ago - not when I was a kid.  I admire all you dauntless dare devils who ride motorcycles or swim with sharks - even you quieter ones who've started blogs and inspired me to follow.  It takes courage to wear your heart on your sleeve and leave a part of you pasted on computer screens across the World Wide Web.  Although it's not easy to take the leap, it's always more empowering on the risky side of the fence.

15.  Stay positive.  I struggle with this daily.  It's easy to focus on the negative things that bring us down.  Go against the grain and look for the positives in your situation.  It may be more difficult, but you'll have a much better day!


There you have it.  No astonishing revelations.  Just a few anecdotes to support my meek experiences.    These are the things that have graduated me to a new age group.  I'm no longer "18-25."  I guess that means I'm not a kid anymore, but I know I still have a lot to learn.  I'm still young.  I mean I haven't had kids yet, so I've got a few more milestones to cross.

Sometimes I wish life could be like this song...
And the birds sing...

My Escape

Most of my life, I've struggled with my over-analytical, excessively critical brain.  I am constantly second-guessing and comparing myself to others - no matter what it is.  Passing a girl in a shopping mall whose hair, the same length as mine, is curled, makes me realize that I can't fix my hair that way.  I must be inferior.  A fellow teacher read 5 books in a month.  I only read 3.  I must not be good enough.  In school when someone would blurt out an answer, I'd cower in my seat realizing I must be way off.  In coaching when my team would lose to a team I knew we were better than, it must have been because that coach was better than me.  If someone doesn't call me back, I must not be good enough to be their friend.  You get the idea.  If I let them, all these things can chisel away at my confidence just as the weathering wind tears at the face of a seaward mountain, scraping away the beauty.

Ultimately, It doesn't really matter what it is, somehow my pessimistic, self-critical brain always sees what I don't have.  Not one of my most favorite characteristics about myself, but I'm sure many of you have experienced this in some way.  In our world, it is so easy to do - compare or wish we had a different/better skill.  I tell you all of this not to throw a pity party (I know who I am in Christ and my identity is found in Him), but to prove that we all need an escape, a haven, a channel to release that tension.  You may not deal with the same emotional or mental struggles as I do, but I'm sure there are things that burden you.  We're human.  Life is not easy.  However, we can often invent ways to cope with these insecurities.  Such as running (or reading - another favorite pastime). 

When I run, there is no one else.  There is no one to compare myself too.  I can't disappoint anyone.  I am only competing against myself.  Even when I have a poor running day, I don't have to report to anyone because I run for me.  It keeps me sane.  It is my escape from the pressure of letting someone else down, of not measuring up.  When I'm only measured against myself, I can't fail according to the standards of others.  It also adds a healthy cardio bonus. 

Now, please don't think I hate my life or myself.  I have a great job, which I love, a wonderful husband, 2 hilarious dogs, great friends, great parents, and I'm very thankful for all of the experiences in my life - good and bad.  They make me who I am.

As we've experienced though, our feeble minds don't always keep us thinking about the positives of life.  When the negatives become like a fog clouding our sanity, we need something positive to clear the weather.   Insert escape.  Mine is running (and reading - it's also therapeutic to jump into someone else's life for a while).  Yours may be decorating or basket weaving or bike riding or dog whispering or paddle boarding.  Who knows? But it's important to find something to throw yourself into to give your mind a break from the fog.  If you're like my husband, it may change from week to week. :)  And that's OK.  Of course, it would be nice if I lived in Bora Bora or some other aesthetically pleasant place.  Then I wouldn't have to work so hard for my "escape."  But I'll keep dreaming. :)